Desperation

I wrote this one night in the middle of a really bad bout of depression. Felt like no one I talked to cared, and those that I knew WOULD care, I didn't feel like I could burden them with what I was feeling. So, I wrote, just like I always do. I'd been listening to Miranda Lamber's CD Crazy Ex-Girlfriend a lot at the time and her song Desperation kept haunting me. So, I took a few lines from the song and here we are. Click on the link in the song's title above to listen to it. (Thanks Miranda, hijacked that link straight off your site)

~Mika

Desperation

(March 25, 2008)

Desperation…

It’s true, I can’t take it any longer. The hurt, the pain, the frustration, all the crap you throw at me on a daily basis. Why not take it somewhere else? Find someone new? I’m desperate for a release, for a break, for just one moment alone without your memory or your false mouth.

I wish you wouldn’t always feel like you have to share it with me. Take it away, keep it to yourself, tell your lies to the wind. Just don’t come around here, expecting me to say okay. Knowing that I’m weak and willing to give in, just for one more night.

There's danger in frustration

The anger bubbles, simmers deep inside. I wait, and I hope and I pray. Pray that you’ll see the light, and come clean, for me. Never works, won’t ever happen. Mile upon mile of dusty desert road unfolds and covers what was left of this love.

I hold the handle, grip the trigger. Here you come again.

Complicated words slipping off of your tongue and ain't one of them the truth

Baby, baby please, ya just gotta belive me. Won’t happen again, didn’t mean a thing. How can I believe, after all this time, after all these lies. Come, let me hold you; make you forget your pain. My love is a force and it won’t leave you stranded, alone.

You come closer, my will is weak. Heart screaming, “Never again!” I take a giant leap.

It all comes undone, falling, falling down to the asphalt. Landing hard, I land on my heart. Just like always. Just the way you always made me fall.

I'm still desperate for you…